Unexpected Triggers and How To Handle Them

Unexpected triggers hit me when I feel great, so I never know how to handle them. Does this ever happen to you?

I am ok if I go to a cancer fundraiser because I know something there will trigger me. But the trigger that hits when I’m out enjoying myself is a real challenge. My heart races, I become lightheaded, and I often cry—no easy explanation for this in real time.

It happened to me two weekends ago and upset me for days. Why now? I am six and a half years cancer-free; I don’t understand why this still occurs. It frustrates me when I get caught off guard.

Can You Prepare for Unexpected Triggers?

The Kentucky Counseling Center states, “An emotional trigger can be your memories or experiences that create a powerful emotional reaction despite your present mood. Emotional triggers are associated with post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD.” https://kentuckycounselingcenter.com/how-to-deal-with-emotional-triggers/.

Finding this article put so many things in perspective. Firstly, an emotional trigger can occur ‘despite your present mood.’ This resonates with me. I was in a terrific mood when this trigger occurred. You might even say I was on an emotional high, and that’s why this trigger was so confusing to me. How can you go from feeling euphoric to freaking out in an instant? We humans are bizarre!

One thing I know for sure regarding triggers is that ignoring them does not help. Exploring what may have brought on your emotional trigger and allowing yourself to feel it will make it occur less frequently. The “old me” would immediately beeline for ice cream or White Castle (sad but true). The new me runs to Google and reads all the emotional trigger articles.

Multiple articles said to create a plan to react to emotional triggers. I took the advice and have a plan for next time.

My Plan for Dealing With Unexpected Triggers

The next time I feel an emotional trigger, I am going to do the following:

• Take four deep breaths. In through the nose, hold for four seconds, and exhale through the mouth for four seconds.
• Create a detailed visual image in my mind of floating in my pool. What color float am I on? Are there any birds in the backyard? What type, and are they making any noise? What colors are the flowers in my view? Is the pool filter creating ripples in the water? Indulge in this visual for thirty seconds to one minute.
• Take a drink of water, if possible.
• Choose to remain or exit the situation.

I will not dwell on the trigger; that I can do tomorrow. I plan to take myself out of the trigger in the moment. Knowing that I have a plan in place makes me feel better already.

“Empower yourself by preparing to cope with triggers. Learn to recognize physical signs of reacting to a trigger, such as changes in your breathing, so that you can employ strategies to calm yourself and shift your emotional state. Your goal should be to detach yourself from the trigger, recenter, and focus on your coping strategy.”

Arlin Cuncic, MA

Why Are My Triggers Not Consistent?

I am sometimes triggered by situations that have previously elicited no response. Hence, my use of the word, unexpected. Very weird. As many of you know, before my breast cancer diagnosis, I was an Executive Vice President of sales at a company selling digital signage software for advertising and marketing. These signs are everywhere! Think of the large screen on top of Madison Square Garden’s entrance in NYC to minor scrolling characters offering Lotto info in delis. If you live near a city, you likely have been accosted by digital signage.

Why would digital signage cause me to experience an unexpected trigger? I see it every single day. It has never caused a physical reaction in me. But I had a meltdown on Freemont Street that Saturday in Las Vegas! My heart beat so fast, I started sweating, and I was dizzy. I fully reacted to the mere thought, “I used to sell this stuff.” It churned every memory of my breast cancer fight, the selling of our home, the loss of my job, and the identity crisis I still struggle to control. And it happened in an instant. It was scary.

I was in Las Vegas to witness the engagement of my daughter. I was so HAPPY! We were celebrating all weekend with family and friends. Moments before this unexpected trigger, I was walking on air, silently thanking God for Brandon (the fiance) and that my family was together. All was good.

Why Did This Happen Now?

Except the emotions lingered and kept swirling through my brain all week. I was an emotional wreck for days. I attempted to write this blog many times but stepped away because it was too painful. Reliving the emotional side of breast cancer trauma is no fun. I am curious why this happened now. As I mentioned earlier, I am six and a half years cancer-free. This makes no sense to me. I am working through it with my therapist. She has been very helpful.

The physical symptoms are no longer present. However, my curiosity is still peaked. I would love to understand what brought this on. Luckily, I cannot spend too much time dwelling on this as we have a wedding to plan! We are refining the guest list and searching for venues. It is an exciting time for all of us. I can’t wait to go wedding dress shopping with Erin. Something tells me I should bring tissues.

Do you ever experience emotional triggers? How do you handle them? Are they unexpected? Please leave a comment below and share what you do when they occur. Thank you for reading my blog.

P.S. Today kicks off breast cancer awareness month. Please be selective in how you support the cause. Buying pink ribbon clothing doesn’t help find a cure, but research does. Ask where your money goes when you make purchases. A lot of marketing goes on in “Pinktober.” For more information, check out my blog from October 2021. https://www.outwittinglife.com/emotional-thoughts-on-breast-cancer-awareness-month/.