How Much Control Over Your Life Do You Really Have?

How many times per day do you read a headline touting it’s time to take control over your life? Is it just me, or are these edicts everywhere you look?

You need to love and accept yourself. You are important to the universe. If you look good, you feel better. Life is a choice; choose wisely. Apple cider vinegar is a sure-fire cure for all your ills. Five minutes of meditation per morning will alleviate all of your stress for the day.

Great suggestions but not a true blueprint for controlling your life.

You can spend your entire day searching the internet, looking for ways to better yourself and gain control over your skincare, your diet, etc. But, you know what? None of those things assist you in taking control over your life.

Can you get lost in motivational sayings and promises of no more wrinkles? There are days that I can eat that “stuff” up, and it does actually give me a little internal push to try and live a more wonderful life.

But, that’s really only the internet sucking me in with advertising; none of those things will alter my life’s path. Only I am in control of my life. Right?

Wrong. I don’t think anyone is in control of their life! (Besides God, but that’s a different post for another day.)

Life is fluid; it’s going on all around us at all times.

When my mother died, I was at the gravesite, and I had a thought that immediately made me feel angry. I thought about how the following day, everything would be back to normal.

The sun would rise, people would commute to work, babies would be born, and someone else’s mom would die. Yet, I wanted to freeze-frame life to give me more time to adjust.

But life doesn’t work that way–it just keeps moving forward.

True Life Events of the Past 48-Hours

• A friend’s parked car was hit and she now has to get a rental car
• Another friend’s stepson was attacked and suffered a brain injury that required immediate surgery (doing ok, so far)
• My neighbor has to put his dog “down” tomorrow
• Due to a “billing error” we just received a $1,000 medical bill from 2020 that we need to pay stat
• My friend was potentially exposed to Covid which means I may have been too (we’re all awaiting test results)

All of the above situations were completely out of your control. Yet, they are totally a part of daily life.

Life happens on life’s terms. It has no set pattern. Life will continue to put positive and negative issues in your path until the day you die.

Kind of makes you feel sorry for control freaks, eh?

I have admitted time and again that I am on an Outwitting Life journey. This basically means I want to outwit the issues life throws at me by turning them into positives. I do not want to engage in everlasting pity parties, even if things happen that could warrant me feeling sorry for myself. Not an easy path!

That, however, is my choice. I have control over my choices. I believe this is the secret that allows us to have a great life (despite tragedies) vs. a dreadful life (wallowing in self-pity over tragedies).

It seems too easy of an answer to be true.

For me, it has been an epiphany! Once I accepted that I have full control over my choices, my life has become much more enjoyable. Of course, I still have my share of challenges (can you say cancer?), but I have learned to accept them. Fighting life’s challenges would make me crazy (or crazier than I already am).

“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.”

― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

I feel freer having accepted this. Can you relate to this?

Life is overwhelming. There are so many sites to see and experiences available that I sometimes don’t know where to start. It can even get a little scary. For instance, what if I make the wrong choice? What if I make things worse than they have to be?

I struggled with this when I was first recuperating from my cancer treatments. I knew in my heart that I was at a crossroads in my recovery. I needed to decide how to proceed, but sometimes I became paralyzed and had to let decisions be made for me.

This eventually turned into learning experiences. I had to learn to make good choices. There were some things that I wanted to do but was physically not yet capable of doing.

Take Control of Your Choices

I wanted so much to get back to work that I attempted it long before my brain was clear enough and my body could physically endure the commute. It was a poor choice. But, it forced me to understand the difference between wants and needs, which was an excellent lesson to learn.

See how I did that? I turned my failed work experience into a positive lesson learned. Always looking for that Outwitting Life angle!

Today, I choose to have a positive outlook. I choose to look for the irony in situations so that I can laugh at them. I choose to be happy. Do I have slip-ups? You betcha! I am not perfect with my choices every day. However, I am much more comfortable with my life than I have ever been.

I innately know that I can face whatever life throws at me since I can choose how to react to it. That’s where my control comes in. I can’t control the event; however, I can control my reaction to it. A simple truth that has taken me years to learn.

Better late than never, right?

What good choices have you made lately? Any poor choices that you have learned from? Do you feel you have some control over your life? Would you mind dropping a comment in the space below and letting me know?