Enjoy the College Selection Process; It’s Another Phase of Parenthood

My son is sixteen years old and a senior in high school. We are currently “on the hunt,” looking for a college that he can attend next year. There are literally thousands of colleges to choose from in the United States. Thank goodness he has already decided that he would like to be a commuter. Given that we live in Nassau County on Long Island, he still has multiple schools to choose from. But, how do you really decide? This process is seriously stressful!

All of the workshops and open houses we have attended have mandated that the key deciding factor in one’s selection process is making sure the college offers the major you want to study. My son wants to be a Business Major. I am happy that he’s chosen what I deem a “useful” major. Chances are, he will wind up in some sort of business capacity after graduation. After all, we are in close proximity to one of the largest business capitals in the world – New York City. However, as rational as this path may seem, there’s a pretty good chance (statistically) that he will not continue on this route after graduation.

According to a 2014 report by the Federal Reserve Bank of New York, only 27% of college graduates wind up in a career that is related to their major. I was a Communications Arts major at Marist College (many moons ago), with a concentration in Journalism. I had plans to be a sportswriter for a major daily newspaper. I put in the due diligence. I was Editor of our school newspaper and Co-Editor of the Yearbook. I wrote High School sports for a local newspaper which afforded me publication examples with a byline. I reached out to every hiring manager at all of the newspapers in New York City and Long Island and was shut down everywhere I went. It was devastating. I had invested so much time and energy in perfecting my craft (of choice) and, yet, I could not find anyone willing to take a chance on me once I had my degree.

I do not want this to happen to my son. I want him to study a broad range of business options so that when he graduates he can choose to meander down multiple paths feeling confident that his education has him well-prepared. As I have stated previously, I also want to win Lotto! If there is one thing I have learned in life it is that nothing goes as planned.

I have a daughter that is graduating college in May 2020. She is about to step out into the world armed with her degree, ready to make a difference for all of us. She has clearly done her due diligence as well. She is a Health Science Major with a concentration in Global Health. She has a minor in Religious Studies. She is President of the Sacred Heart University chapter of Habitat for Humanity, President, Alpha Phi Omega Service Fraternity, VP, Class of 2020, an Academic Student Leader Mentor and an Intern for Campus Ministry. Her resume is very impressive. What will this afford her? Will her career lead her to become a CEO at a Non Profit? I hope so! While obviously biased, I believe she has the leadership skills to go far in the business world. But, will she?

It will be interesting to see where both of my children will be in five years. Will they be part of the 27% that find jobs related to their college majors or will they be blazing their own trails in completely different fields? As a society, we put a lot of pressure on our teenagers. They have to decide on what college they want to attend, what major they should select, whether they want to commute or go away to school, etc. Then there is the whole financial piece to consider. Do they attend a SUNY school, a Community College or a Private School? There is just so much pressure involved with getting an education!

What is the alternative? If you read all the “Business Gurus,” you do not stand a chance of getting a job in business without a college degree. Some careers warrant you obtain a Master’s Degree. Millions of dollars are being spent on education in the U.S. that may or may not be used in the real world. I find this incredibly frustrating. I truly feel for my children in their respective points in their educational journeys. Michael is having to make his best-educated guess in choosing a college and major that are the right fit for him. Erin is about to find out if her college choices will translate into good job offers with a sustainable income and a clear career path. There is a lot of stress on both of them. Do you think I’ve used that word enough?

As a parent, all I really want is for my kids to be happy and get a good education. Fortunately, Erin and Sacred Heart University were an extremely good fit. I believe her accomplishments and experiences, along with her overall education have prepared her well to enter the “real world” next May. I sincerely hope Michael has a similar experience at whatever school he winds up attending. That’s why the selection process is so important. He needs to find the place that he feels comfortable so he can concentrate on his education.

It has been very interesting to observe what is important to me (as a parent) vs. Michael when reviewing a school. While Michael is checking to see how close the campus is to Taco Bell, I am researching what the job placement rate is at that particular college. I am okay with that. He’s sixteen years old and I don’t want him stressing over getting his first job just yet. He should enjoy his college years (not, too much though) as he will be working for the rest of his life.

This is a totally different phase of parenthood. My babies are growing up and I need to let them. Having always been in the caretaker role it is difficult for me to step back and allow my kids to make their own decisions. Old habits are hard to break. I think it is important to recognize that your child is not the only one entering a new phase of development. Our whole family is evolving. I find it exciting and scary at the same time. I know everything may not go “according to plan,” but I have faith it will go as exactly as it should. I cannot wait to see where this journey takes us all!