Defining Your Life’s Purpose After Breast Cancer or Tragedy

One day, you are living your best life, and the next day you are defining your life’s purpose after breast cancer or tragedy.

How can this happen? You were just full of purpose with everything on track. But then you find a lump in your breast, or you get called to the emergency room because “there’s been an accident.”

In an instant, your world is upside down. Why? Why did this happen to you and your family? How do you go about finding your purpose again? Can you?

I ask myself these questions every day.

It’s been four years since I started fighting breast cancer.

The timing was horrible (as if it could ever be good). My daughter was starting her first semester away at college; similarly, my son was entering high school. What exciting times for them!

Things quickly became scary. Worry and fear replaced the thrill of embracing new schools. The road ahead was unknown, forcing our family to embark on an unwanted journey. Yikes!

Since I have already mentioned this happened four years ago, it’s obvious this story has (so far) had a happy ending.

I am still here and able to torture my children! (Just kidding.)

What is your purpose?

Am I living my best life?

From outside appearances, I bet everything seems fine. However, every day is a struggle. But, that’s not what I want to discuss in this blog.

Instead, I want to focus on finding purpose after a life-changing event.

Part of my story includes a bout with Sepsis that almost killed me. Sepsis is nasty stuff! That near-death experience convinced me that I need to embrace my purpose. Do you know what your purpose is?

Have you always innately been aware of it, or are you still searching for it? Do you believe we all have a purpose?

I do.

Something inside me is driving me to embrace my purpose. I believe it is my faith. The justification for me beating Sepsis (and putting breast cancer in remission) has to be because I have yet to fulfill my purpose. God is waiting for me to do more.

Too much information for you? I know we all have our own beliefs, so please respect mine for now. Ok?

If you build it, will they really come?

This past year, I have done so much soul searching. I have been looking for the bolt of lightning to hit me and shout my life purpose in my face. Silly me, right?

My search led me on some very, very interesting paths. The internet truly is a wonderous and vast wealth of information. If you ask my husband, I spend way too much time “surfing.” I prefer to call it researching. However, that research wound up revealing a pattern to me.

I started searching for successful women bloggers of all ages. I followed a bunch, and they provided me with many resourceful tips and ideas for me to continue outwitting life. And, then, I took a step back. I unfollowed the bloggers that didn’t truly resonate with me.

Guess what I found myself left with?

Positive, unrelenting women whose purpose is to help other women succeed. Women who help other women. What a concept, right?

While it might not have been a lightning bolt, it was definitely a light bulb moment.

What really appeals to me is that it doesn’t matter whether you are twenty-four years old or seventy. Women helping women is ageless. We could all use a little help, right?

I have been doing this blog as a hobby for about two years now. I am going to step up my game. I’m going to build it and pray like heck that they come!

How can I help?

My journey fighting breast cancer took me to places I had never been before. It forced me to learn more about breast cancer than I ever thought possible. I learned how to combat my own chemo breath that was so horrible I actually thought it was coming from our garbage.

It made me learn budgeting and downsizing, and using your head to steady yourself to stand up in the bathroom. (I’m not making this up!) I learned how to mourn a successful, badass career without becoming bitter.

A List of Small Things I Learned When Sick:

• Providing a meal to a family with a sick mom (person) is akin to giving them gold
• Notes of encouragement are wonderful. They can be re-read any and every day!
• A ring and run doorbell prank that leaves a pizza on their mat will make a family giddy
• Gift cards for food are always welcome
• Send a plant or cookies – too many flowers reek of funeral homes
• You can never have enough hand cream or scented candles
• Motivational mugs and some good teas are never a bad choice
• A Snoopy bathrobe can bring a smile on the worst day
• Rides to chemo and radiation are priceless
• You can never have too many girlfriends

This experience opened my eyes to the kindness in the world!

What Have You Found Yourself Consistently Doing?

When I think about it, I have always been a caretaker. I used to love visiting with Mrs. Smith down the block, who was in her 70’s when I was about ten years old. I loved having tea and a couple of Lorna Doones with my Nannie (grandmother) every day after school. I enjoyed helping and being kind to elders.

My favorite career position was being a manager. I wanted so much to have everyone on my team succeed. Nothing made me happier than watching one of my salespeople buy their first car or home. I was their biggest cheerleader and did everything I possibly could to help them.

I love being a wife and a mother. Doing little things for my family brings me so much joy. I still like to make my son his lunch for work and cook tuna noodle casserole (her favorite) for my daughter when she’s home. And, I enjoy bringing my husband his robe and slippers each evening. NOT! Just making sure everyone is paying attention!

Care-taking seems to be inbred in me. I am fortunate to have inherited my mother’s quick wit and sense of humor. I might have some traits that could transition nicely into helping other women stay positive in the face of tragedy and adjust to their new normal. Or, perhaps, create their new normal?

Do You Need To Reinvent Yourself?

Cancer/tragedy either cripples you for life or opens the door for you to begin outwitting life by reinventing yourself. I have chosen to reinvent myself and am happy to share how I have been able to do so. It takes work, but it has been so worth it!

I want to help other women reinvent themselves. We all have many talents and so much to give as a result of our experiences. And, we are never too old or young to try something new.

Thank you for reading this extremely personal post to the end. I am about to embark on a more targeted journey focused on helping other women become their best selves.

Would you mind letting me know in a comment below if you have some suggestions on ways I can help you? Do you think I have the ability to help other women? Would you enjoy reading this type of blog? Are there specific topics you would like me to explore?

Your feedback would be very beneficial. Thank you.